How to Start Journaling

As I mentioned in my previous post, Writing As a Cure, I decided I needed to get over my fears, embarrassment and pure procrastination and start journaling. The only person standing in my way is me. I then started contemplating how should I go about journaling. I mean, I can do the normal and keep a journal, which I don't mind because I love buying journals even though they don't get put to use. But then I decided I needed a better plan than that, because in order to make this a consistent habit I needed variety like in everything else in my life (my brain is a mess and room is, too, literally). Luckily, Ryan got me a couple stocking stuffers this year that would help me with the variety department of this process.

I had my SMASH book for a while, but haven't put it to a lot use since that purchase. Now that I have a polaroid camera that prints photos instantly (at a high cost!) I don't have an excuse on not having pictures to scrapbook/smash with. Ryan also got me a F*CK I'm In My Twenties Guided Journal, which I wonder how he views me if that's what's in my stocking during Christmas (:D), but besides that point it actually has some pretty fun guided topics to go through that would help me journal. And lastly, Ryan got me a little booklet that is for writing letters to my future self. I love it! It actually has the pages sent up as letters that fold up into an envelope and you seal them with stickers for you to open later. I really enjoy writing letters to my future self. They always seem to appear right when I need them the most.

So I think for now, this is enough variety to keep me motivated to journal. I'll let you guys know how it goes these next couple of weeks. The next step is figuring out when to fit it into my schedule. If you have any journaling ideas or tips I would love to hear them!

Love, Mailee

Writing As A Cure

Photo from pixabay.com/jarmoluk

Ryan recently sent me an article, Writing Your Way to Happiness, that I found fascinating. I, personally, used to love to write and felt like it was one of my greatest strengths, but in recent years I've found myself dreading to write, whether it was research papers or jotting down journal entries (which I definitely haven't done consistently throughout the years).

I used to work in a tutoring center for students with dyslexia and although I don't have dyslexia myself, I felt that this was probably how they felt sometimes. They were all very bright with a variety of interests, but when they were asked to write down those things it was sometimes a painful process. My situation was a little different where my struggle was that I just despised the process of finding the right words to convey my thoughts and theories. I found writing very frustrating and didn't feel like I had enough patience with myself the things that went through my head. After reading the article a couple of nights I ago, I laid down in bed and started wondering if this would help me - to write down my personal narrative and then rewrite it.

Initially, I was excited about starting this writing experiment, but then I started to feel discouraged that I wouldn't be able to follow through and keep it a consistent habit. I then thought about all of the times that I tried to start journaling and all of the times I've failed to write more than a mere paragraph about my day. Why was I struggling with something that I valued so much? Then it finally clicked! I remembered how I used to journal when I was in high school and how much I enjoyed the process, but then I remember re-reading my journals after a couple of months and being so embarrassed of myself, experiences, and thoughts. I would rip out those pages even though they contained some important memories, because I just couldn't handle how public these things were, even if I was the only one reading them. I felt vulnerable and naked to have these private and personal entries out in the open on those pages. I couldn't hide them unless I just disposed of them, so I did. And that, alas, is why I can't seem to stay consistant with my writing. It's scary to open up and display those fears, but I've decided that this is an important step I need to take. I need to get over my trepidation even if it means that I need to accept myself as I am.

Love, Mailee

I NEED to try this

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